Listen to Episode 25: iTunes – Spotify – Stitcher – Soundcloud
Kara is a relationship educator from Allen, TX, and the owner of Verge Relationships, LLC. She earned her PhD in Family Studies from TWU and her master’s degree in dispute resolution from SMU.
After working for a time as a family mediator, helping couples divide up their assets and work out child custody arrangements, she knew she wanted to reach couples much earlier in the process, before they hit rough patches. After participating in premarital classes with her husband, she left her job in higher education to step into the nonprofit realm, focused on marriage and family strengthening. After that experience, Kara decided to pursue her PhD and simultaneously open her own business serving couples in 2014.
Since then, Verge Relationships has experienced tremendous year-over-year growth, and Kara’s been fortunate to serve hundreds of couples and individuals through private sessions, workshops, and speaking engagements. She’s certified to facilitate a variety of relationship programs, and she has also taught courses at local universities. Kara is a 3-time recipient of The Knot’s “Best of Weddings” award for her premarital classes.
Kara’s research and practical work with couples center on how couples communicate and engage in conflict, especially as they make big decisions and prepare for major transitions like marriage and first- time parenthood together.
Kara is married with a 3-year-old daughter and baby #2 on the way this summer.
Topics discussed:
- Starting a business and finding a niche
- Turning down certain opportunities
- Knowing your strengths and weaknesses
- The research behind relationships
- Does marriage conflict with a music career?
- The difference between marriage and dating
- Setting expectations
- The importance of having support
- Managing child care, school and business all at once
- You can have it all, but not all at once
- The importance of self care and having fun
- Foundation of friendship
- Importance of having a positive perspective
- Identifying solvable vs perpetual conflicts
- Our unique versions of what a good partner looks like
- Money as a perpetual conflict
- “Getting curious not furious”
- How to frame a need or request
- “I feel ______ about _____________. I need/appreciate ________.”
- Destructive vs constructive conflict
- The dangers of avoiding conflict
- Addressing the issue at hand
- How to forge business relationships
- Behavioral psychology 101
- Smile with your eyes
- Separate vs joint bank accounts
- Kara’s #1 piece(s) of advice
Resources & names mentioned:
- Dr. John Gottman
- The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman
- Dr. Scott Stanley
- Crucial Conversations by Patterson, Grenny, McMillan, Switzler
- The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman
Thanks for listening and keep thriving!
